May 09, 2011

social stigma about dating younger/older people

We've all seen younger men/older women, or older women/younger men. Some of these couples are truly compatible and in love, yet we cannot help it but to raise an eyebrow when we see these couplings in public. I try not to judge, but society has made me a skeptic.

Older women & Younger men
The common conception/misconception about this type of relationship is that the woman is a cougar! Younger men are attracted to woman's confidence and her independence. And the older woman is attracted to the liveliness of younger man.

Older men & Younger women
The common conception/misconception about this type of relationship is that the woman is attracted to the man's financial standing and his maturity. Older men are perceived as attracted to beauty and youth.

We cannot completely veto these ideas, for these are some of the reason why people date outside their age group. I guess if you look deeper into this, it really has to do with maturity levels. I would like to introduce a theory: Age-maturity expectancy.

What is Age-maturity expectancy?
Society/ourselves/people we don't know, expects a person of a certain age to behave in a certain way that is considered "age appropriate". As a society, we understand that maturity has nothing to do with age, as everyone matures differently, but we cannot help but use age as a factor when determining someone's maturity level.

How does this age-maturity expectancy theory ties in with the age of our partners? When we are of a certain age group, we are expected to reach certain milestones, or else it would seem like we are not progressing in the book of life. When you're in your 20's you get a job, when you're in your 30's you start a family, and so forth. Yes, these milestones may seem traditional, and outdated, but the reality is that it becomes increasingly difficult to mark these milestones if you are outside of its age group. Nature did not intend for people to have children over a certain age, although humans are always pushing these boundaries, some things only nature knows best. Nowadays we have women over the age of 50 giving birth to babies, it is truly a miracle and a blessing, but it will be difficult to care for the infant when the health and bodily functions start to decline.

So, when we are still in the same type of relationships we were 10 years ago, still dating the same 16 year old, people may start to question your maturity level. As a ripen adolescent begins to venture into romantic relationships, it is first puppy love, then as he/she progresses, the relationships are deemed more meaningful, more soul fulfilling. Eventually the relationship is beyond puppy love, but more about caring for the partner, becoming somebody's pillar of life. I cannot deter or redefine the social stigma of dating someone who is significantly older/younger, but as long as both parties are on the same maturity platform, that's all it should matter! Impeccable compatibility!

Here are some celebrity couplings!

Taylor Swift and John Mayer who is 12 years her senior!

Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal who is 9 years her senior!

Taylor Swift and Taylor Launter who is 2 years her junior!

Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore who is 15 years his senior!

Bahaha, Taylor Swift is maturing real fast so she can write songs!

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